Monday, March 5, 2018


Here is the thing. I am a Pimp. And my business partner is a Madam and a former Dominatrix. We run escort agencies all over Europe. And none of that makes us bad people. Or even the people you think. So suspend whatever moral or ethical judgments you might be thinking of passing and listen up. If you have no interest in reality then I suggest that you click off this blog post right now. Because what I am going to tell you is not what you expect. Expectations will get you nowhere unless you are willing to challenge them from time to time. You will just get stuck in a way of thinking and reinforce your own prejudices. And you do not need me for that.
selfie of escort girl wearing white bikini

The sex industry is not what people think either. The modern sex industry is as close to the world shown in The Deuce as Bill Gates is to people in caves banging the rocks together. The provision of sex for money is as old as human beings. Hell, for all I know it might pre-date human beings. Certainly female chimpanzees are perfectly happy to swap chimp sex for food. So, when I say that we run the largest and best escort agency in Marbella that does not mean what you think it does. We do not have a posse of girls hanging out on street corners in fuck me heels and little else. We do not have muscle that mugs customers and steal their belongings. And we sure as all hell do not get involved in drugs.

Nope, what we do has more to do with any other consumer based international business. We have to work out what customers want, supply it, manage suppliers and clients, take care of staff and sub contractors. But mainly we have to market, advertise, promote and sell. Being a Pimp or a Madam in today's industry has bugger all to do with street girls if you actually want to make money. It has more to do with being a sensible common or garden business person. The most important tool in the box is the web site. Have a good enough web site and you will get the customers. Likewise, get a web site that is good enough and you will attract the girls, without whom you are screwed. Well, you know what I mean.

Wednesday, January 24, 2018

I Am A Prostitute With Opinions

I am a prostitute. I am a prostitute with a mind an opinions. Deal with it. Why on earth do people have the impression that everyone in the sex industry is an alcoholic drug addict who is forced into the work by the modern equivalent of white slave traders that used to feature in Agatha Christie novels? By the way, I love the way the emphasis on white slave traders, as though trading black slaves was not evil. How things change! Are there people out there who have been forced to work by people? Yes, absolutely. A lot of the African street girls I see in places like Ibiza and most Italian cities are working to pay off their fees to the people who smuggled them into Europe. Likewise, lots of the Chinese and Vietnamese girls working in massage parlours are paying off the “snake heads” who brought them to Europe. But like Misha Glenny says in his book McMafia, most people who are smuggled into Europe or North America by these people do not actually see them as evil. Most people are just glad to have a chance – once they have paid their debt – to have money to send back to their families and build a better future. I know it is incomprehensible to most people who have been born in freedom, but there it is.

What most people refuse to recognize is that in the scheme of things, only a very small percentage of
escort girl wearing black satin bra and unzipped nike hoodie
women working in the sex business are streetwalkers or work in brothels. The vast majority of us work independently. We advertise in the local newspapers, through Backpage and the people who copy it, through escort malls (Directories) such as Eurogirls and some of us choose to be represented (not managed or run!) by escort agencies such as Classic Courtesans in London. We set our own rates. Generally, unless the agency is really good (and they are, by the way) we will work less and less with them once we are established in a town and build our own client list.

We set our own hours. We can accept work or say no to it. We can stop working with an agency when we like. We pay our taxes – well, I do anyway. We try to stay away from drugs. Many of us have boyfriends or husbands. A lot of us have children. Basically, we run our own businesses. We have been here forever and we are going to stay.

Friday, January 19, 2018

The Prurient Interest Of Civilians About The Sex Industry

Being in the escort business is normally just like being in any other business or industry. It has boring bits, interesting bits and most days somewhere in between. And talking to other people who work in the industry is, again, just like any other. Colleagues, suppliers, partners, clients. Some you like, some you don't, most somewhere in between. But it gets strange and interesting when you start talking with people who are not in the industry; “civilians”. When someone from outside escort agency business discovers what you do for a living there are two reactions – revulsion or fascination. Revulsion, fair enough. People are entitled to their opinion and I respect them for it as long as they neither abuse me or try to “save me”.

The fascination again comes in two varieties – people who want to join the agency in some (or even any) capacity, and the “spider under glass” complex, where people just want to ask you everything that they can possibly imagine, down to the smallest detail – as though they were pulling the legs off a spider to see what happens. It is a very strange experience to be interrogated and grilled as though you are the most unusual beast that they have ever encountered. Is running an escort agency in Tenerife so interesting to people? It seems so. Down to the smallest scale, apparently. Though the questions are almost always the same.

How did I get into the industry? Am I a people trafficker? Am I a drug dealer? Some people even go so far as to ask me which cartel I am connected to! What do I earn? What kind of men buy sex? Answer – ones with a pulse. If I am not a people trafficker, how do I get girls to join my agency? Do escorts have to have sex or do they just go out and party? People really should stop watching movies. Girls absolutely go out and party, get some drinks, dinner, and then go to a club. And then they have sex. The range of questions is as extensive as it is predictable. And if people actually listened to the answers instead of just collecting stories with which to titillate their friends they would probably have enough information for me to have far more competitors. But the fact that they never do is why I answer the questions so willingly. That and the fact that the grilling means they are buying the drinks...

Thursday, January 18, 2018

Is Seeing Escorts Addictive?

I get the weirdest question from people all the time. Some of them – I promise you – you could not begin to imagine. Think of the strangest, most unusual, weirdest or most perverse question you could think of asking someone involved in the sex business. Now, whatever you have come up with, no matter how embarrassed you might be of thinking of it, I promise you someone has asked me it before. Probably more than once. It reminds me of a really funny scene from Secret Diary Of A Call Girl, where Billy Piper is in the back seat of a taxi answering a call from a client for the Agency and she says “yes, she does that. Yes, she does that. Yes, she will do that. No, no-one does that!”But this week, I got a question that rocked me back on my heels and set me to thinking. Is seeing escorts addictive? Wow.

escort wearing black panties and white crop top lying on bed
My first reaction was to laugh. But then I thought about it seriously. Michael Douglas apparently went to have treatment for sex addiction and there seems to be a thriving industry treating people for that “problem”. But while I can see that people might get a real buzz from the orgasms (obviously) and from the attention involved in getting the sex, I am a bit more cynical. I suspect treatment for sex addiction is a good way for guilty spouses (of both sexes) who have been caught cheating to avoid costly divorce settlements. Hey, the fact that it is cynical does not mean I am wrong! And I can certainly see that the illicit nature of sneaking off to spend time with an escort in Barcelona can be very exciting. But no matter how good the sex or how forbidden or depraved the situation or sexual activity, is it addictive? Well I do not really think so, at least not in the sense of addiction that hooks someone physiologically as well as psychologically.

Alcohol, heroin, prescription opiates, cocaine; they are addictive. An addict literally can not function without a supply of their substance. There is a huge difference between feeling like your flesh is peeling off and feeling really horny all the time. Can escorts be incredibly appealing and get into a guys head and loins? Definitely. But addictive? Only in the sense that chocolate or really good espresso are!

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Why Do Models Become Escorts?

The question of why escorts become models occurred to me, oddly enough, after going to the cinema and watching “Molly's Game”, written and directed by Aaron Sorkin and starring Jessica Chastain and Molly Bloom and Idris Elba. There is one scene in it where Molly (Chastain giving a hell of a performance) is recruiting her promotional girls and cocktail waitresses for her poker game in New York. All four of them are ex Playboy models, but all four of them are something else – one is a computer expert, one has the phone numbers for half of the Saudi Royal family, and so on. In the film none of them are escorts, they just use their looks and their previous careers and portfolio to charm men. Especially rich and wealthy ones.

What does that have to do with models becoming escorts? Pretty much everything when you think about it. Why do women become models? Because they can make more money and have a better lifestyle by using their looks and bodies than they can through other means. No matter how big their. A woman with a degree in engineering is still going to have a hard time making the kind of money a successful model can. If a woman becomes a top model she will be propositioned all the time. For huge amounts of money. If a woman becomes a less successful model she will be propositioned all the time. For less money, but still. In both circumstances hey are being asked to have sex with men for money. And if the bookings start to decline, or the daily rates start to drop for her photo shoots, what is she to do to maintain her income and lifestyle? Especially if, like most people – of both sexes – in their twenties she has not been putting a lot of money aside for the future? Well, there were all those propositions that she used to get. And she has been selling her body in one way, so just how much of a line is it to become a high class escort?

And once the line has been crossed once, probably with an old modelling client, or an admirer who has hit on her before, then the next step, to having two careers, to being an ex model and a full time escort is very small. Ultimately, why do models become escorts? Because they can.  

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Sex Worker Intelligence

Well that was a curates egg. Crappy that there was a public event with little time to plan for it. Good that she was smart enough to follow advice. And awesome that she understood what it took to be secure. But now she really took me aback. “I am surprised you are still body guarding, to be honest, Willie. I would have thought that for a man like you it would be too dull. After all, there are not too may people who can say that they went to the Falklands and then did three years in the Det – tailing that stocky little now jolly politician no less, now he has laid down his Armalite – and even fewer who also did six years with the Regiment. They really did send you to some shit holes, didn't they? Colombia, Bolivia, Serbia, Iraq. And whole host of other places you never went.”

I did my best not to look like a slack jawed yokel. Though I was starting to feel it next to her. We might be sitting nice and cozily in a sitting room of the most glamorous and elegant Las Palmas sex club I had ever seen, but this woman had just laid out parts of my life that even my best friends did not know. Well, would not have known if I had any friends. So I took a few seconds to give her a dead eyed stare. It had stopped violent criminals and armed drug smugglers in their tracks. She did not seem to give a toss. She just smiled sweetly at me.

“Forgive me for being direct, but how does a professional sex worker get that sort of information?”

“As opposed to an amateur sex worker? What would that be, exactly? A wife?” It was a nice deflection and I smiled slightly despite myself.

“If I am going to put my welfare in someone else´s hands I am going to check out who they are. The bio sent by your employers looks like it was written by an illiterate civil servant with a vague relationship with the English language and no knowledge of you. It was totally generic. So I asked around.”

I understood what she was saying, but for goodness sake, even my C.O.s in the Regiment did not know about what I did with the Det. And vice versa. And it looked as though vice versa might well be an appropriate phrase. I stayed quiet. I suspected that she would have no problem sitting there quietly for an hour while I gave her the thousand yard stare. Fortunately she decided to explain.

Saturday, December 9, 2017

Escort Agencies & Nightclubs

The first step for Tommy and Angela was to find out whether their adult businesses were being targeted specifically or if there were just caught up in some Europe-wide campaign against everyone in the industry. So they tasked their managers to check out with their local competitors what was going on. Fortunately they had received pretty much the same approach from what sounded like the same leather driving-coated Romanian gentlemen. To Tommy and Angela that was actually good news. If they were trying to muscle the whole industry that required one kind of response. A relatively low key one just to discourage them and scale back their ambitions.

If they had been after Tommy and Angela´s escort businesses andnightlclubs specifically, then that would have been a real problem. And what would have followed might have made Liam Neeson in Taken look like a romantic walk in the park.

Instead, they just needed to realise that the light was not worth the candle. And being who they were, Angela and Tommy had long since laid out a When/Then plan for exactly this scenario. That was just the way they thought.

So Tommy placed a call to one of his former colleagues and set things in motion. His lean tanned face was actually smiling as he did so. Most things in the business were pretty mundane now. But what was coming was just going to be fun. Bloody funny in fact.

The arrangements, having been made, he and Angela started to chat through the next few days and sort out logistics and communications. The escort agencies and clubs would be fine while they dropped off the radar. They pretty much ran themselves anyway. Only a dozen people knew how to contact them at any time. So being even more incommunicado would not cause any issues at all.

If it were not for the fact that they deserved it, Tommy and Angela might almost have felt sorry for the poor little Romanian mobsters. Almost, but not quite. It would actually be quite nice to get out of the designer threads they had been wearing for the past few weeks and back into the combats and technical kit.